The pretender is so attracted to the state of disability that he feels driven to act out the disabled lifestyle in some way, if only occasionally. He may make or buy the accoutrements of physical disability - crutches, leg-braces, a wheelchair - and act out his fantasy of being disabled. Often this is a hidden activity done in the secrecy of the home. The more daring and self-accepting pretender may venture into public places. He may travel far from home to an anonymous city where he is not known, to act out his disabled lifestyle. Being on the receiving end of the curious stare becomes something to be sought. Internally, he feels good about looking and behaving disabled. Sometimes this good feeling is balanced by self-doubt and guilt over his desires to pretend.